Category Archives: child

Five Things Maternity Leave Taught Me

Yesterday was the last day of my maternity leave, and I cannot help but reflect on the last six weeks. Spending time with my newborn baby, and his older sister was nothing short of amazing. Having had my daughter in daycare since she was six weeks old (she is currently seventeen months old) I missed out on her growing up. While spending time with our newest addition I got to catch up with her as well. I also got to learn things about her, our new baby, and myself.
1.       They really do grow up too fast
I cannot believe my son is already six weeks old today. I swear I just gave birth a few days ago. Six weeks ago? Really??? My itsy bitsy baby now weighs twelve pounds?
2.       Nursing is very relaxing
You would think I would have learned this with my daughter, but back then I was a newbie and I was too concerned with doing everything “right” to stop and just simply enjoy having my baby next to me, doing all sorts of cute things while feeding.
3.       It is okay if your kid starts crying
I used to be terrified of running errands with my daughter when she was a newborn in case she started crying in public and then everyone would think I am a bad mother. Now, I am not saying it is okay to allow your kids to have a complete melt down while you are at the grocery store, but a little sniffling, whining and general complaining in public can be okay. Your children are not little angels regardless of what you keep telling yourself. Mine are not little angels either. If I plan on ever getting anything done, I need to come to terms with this fact.
4.       I am still me
Just because I have a baby and a seventeen months old does not mean I am now relegated to be chained to my children with no time for myself in sight. Of course time to myself is now far shorter and more sporadic, but it exists, and I savor it when I get it. Spending twenty four hours a day with my children for the past six weeks helped me realize that the couple of hours I got to myself on Saturdays was indeed a time to indulge but spend wisely. I would think of all the things I wanted to do, and then come up with the one thing I REALLY wanted to do. It was almost like finding myself all over again.
5.       Getting dressed up is optional
I cannot count the times my daughter and I had pajama days in the past few weeks. Before having children I could not fathom even getting the mail without first donning a cute outfit. Then after having my daughter I relaxed a bit, but still required quite some maintenance to even make it to the grocery store. Then the second came around. A splash of make-up and clean clothes is all I require now. Flip flops will suffice.
What are some of your maternity stories?

Crying It Out At Bedtime

It is one in the morning. My daughter is in bed. She is not asleep. She is screaming her little head off, and we are letting her. My husband and I tried everything. She does not want to sleep. She wants to come out and hang out with us. We want to go to sleep. My husband has work in the morning, and I have a two week old who will be waking up in a matter of minutes for his nightly feedings. Our daughter needs to go back to sleep.
We are letting her cry it out. We have never done it to this extent. We have let her cry for a few minutes in the past, testing to see if maybe she will calm herself down, but usually we give in and go back in her room. Not this time. There is no consoling her, not after this many hours. We have no choice.
I am sitting up in bed nursing my son, listening to my daughter’s shrieks and screams coming from the other room, and it is hard. I feel inadequate, and hearing her saddens me. I know it is for her own good in the long run, but what is a mother to do?
She has been acting up at bedtime ever since her baby brother arrived a few weeks ago, and it is getting worse and worse every night. She needs to learn that bedtime is bedtime. She cannot continue to get away with prolonging it to all hours. Thankfully after about fifteen minutes the crying subsides. She finally falls asleep. But is she asleep? Or is she just lying there quietly because she feels abandoned? I know better than to go into her room as that would ensure another round of screaming. I hope she is asleep.
Did you ever have to let your child cry it out? What did you do?

Can I Discipline My Neighbor’s Children?

9 p.m. is not that late. I know this. But I also know that when you are trying to get small children to sleep, and you will be up at around 5:30 the next morning to get these children ready and then go to work, 9 p.m. might as well be midnight.
Children play, run around, scream, shriek, etc. I know this. But I don’t know why our neighbors allow their small children to do this in their back yard at 9 p.m. on a regular basis. These children are screaming at the top of their lungs as if they were playing poolside on a Saturday afternoon. It is Tuesday night on a small cul-de-sac where we are not the only people who have to be at work the next day (I am currently on maternity leave, so I don’t technically qualify as one of these people, but maternity leave is not forever, and our new neighbors are wearing out their welcome, along with my nerves).
My husband has gone over and spoken with them about it, but that was a temporary solution. They are not violating any noise ordinance laws, just the laws of common decency. Is it okay to continuously go over there to ask them to monitor their children’s noise levels? And why aren’t these small children in bed by now?

What would you do?