Category Archives: parenting

Why My Children’s Goldfish Scares Me

I have to confess, I am terrible at keeping things alive. Since I have two small children, I know this may sound scary, but I assure you, I am great with the kids. Plants and high maintenance pets on the other hand are a completely different story.
I once had a fern. It died. Ferns are supposed to be super easy to maintain and extremely durable. I inadvertently killed a cactus. They don’t even require water! People give me plants as gifts a lot. Despite my best efforts they never make it more than a week.
So, one day, not long from now, when one of my kids brings home a pet, unless it is a kitty or a puppy, I am terrified of the outcome. I can just see the tears and screaming when their goldfish, which they so carefully named, and loved, goes missing. How many times am I going to have to replace it in the middle of the night? How similar do hamster look? Will they know Buttons is an imposter?
Aside from cats and dogs (of which I have my share), pets can be a lot of maintenance. And even though I know my kids will absolutely promise to take care of them, I know from experience that the duty will fall to the parents. Which is why I pray my husband’s green thumb translates into a purple thumb and he will be better equipped to understand the complex filtration and temperature system which comes with a fish tank. I hope he knows about overfeeding small rodents. I hope he knows about the temperature requirements of iguanas. Because I thought I did. I had done all the research, spend meticulous hours adjusting and readjusting the living conditions for my various pets (and mind you I was not a little kid at the time, I was in college). I would check water alkalinity and even make sure there were enough bubbles. I may have even counted the grains of sand at the bottom of the tank. All for nothing. My fish never made it to the end of the week. My mice passed out and died. I never had a bird, but if I had, it probably would have suffered a similar fate. Which is why I am terrified of my children’s pets.
How do you feel about pets your children brought home?P.S. I had to amend this post, because my husband brought it to my attention that I did not specify that after stating my mice passed out I did not follow up with their untimely death. Poor little Blackie passed out and died.

8 Reasons to Attend a Community College

Although my children are far from college age, I cannot help plan for their futures. As any mother, I want what is best for children, so honestly when the time comes I would really like if they were to go to a local community college first and then transfer to a larger four year institution. This is why:
1.       Going to a community college first can help them discover what they really want to do. We all have ideas of what we want to major in when we are in high school, but sometimes in our first or second year we find new interests. Most community colleges allow them to explore these options, dabble in coursework for different fields, and identify their goals.
2.       Regardless of whether they will attend a four year out of high school, or transfer to one from a community college, they will still have to go through the college acceptance process. However, if they choose to transfer it postpones the process by a few years. Along with number one above, this grants them the opportunity to mature a bit, and deal with the stress and aggravation of the acceptance process at a time when they are better prepared for it.
3.       Community colleges have some amazing professors and learning opportunities and they are nothing to scoff at.
4.       Honestly, a lot of money can be saved following this route. I cannot say what the economy will be like 15 years from now when my daughter will be going to college, or 16 years from now when my son will follow. But saving money is a good thing in any economy.
5.       In large university settings they may not always get the attention they might need from a professor. Community colleges are often in smaller settings and they have more chances to speak to their professors privately after class or during office hours to discuss any questions about lectures or coursework.
6.       Community colleges are often smaller in size than four year institutions, which may offer just the transition they need.
7.       Not everyone is out to get a four year degree. Sometimes an Associates Degree or just learning some marketable skills will suffice.
8.       A community college can allow them to live at home for a few more years if the four year they will aim towards is out of town. Not only will that save money, but it may again help them mature a bit before having to be on their own.
Having considered all of the above I really hope my children will be inclined to attend a community college. However, it will ultimately be their choice.
How do you feel about community colleges?

Breastfeeding Dilemma

There seems to be common misconception about what breasts are supposed to do. As sexualized as they have become in modern times it is no wonder that a lot of women are confused as to their intended purpose, which is to feed babies.
Yes, breasts are sexy, and depending on preference, the larger the better. However, did anyone stop to think why large breasts are deemed so desirable? Because they imply fertility and large stores of milk once the baby arrives.
I know that some women cannot breastfeed due to not producing enough milk. Or they have some other physical reasons for being unable to. These are not the women I am thinking of for this article.
I do not understand why so many women are completely freaked out by the prospect of breastfeeding. I understand it is a strange sensation. Having done it for two kids now, I have to say it is not like anything I have ever felt, and frankly cannot describe it.
Some women I know cannot handle this sensation, and they choose to pump and feed their children expressed milk. At least these babies are still receiving breast milk. Then there are the women who chose not to do this, and their babies get only formula. That is their choice, and I will not judge.
However, there are women who think breastfeeding is wrong because breasts are sexual organs and it disturbs them to think of babies feeding from them. These are the ones I have a problem with. Let me reiterate that there were two other sexual organs involved in producing the baby, so really, it is not too far fetched that a third should be feeding him. I am not sure when society started sexualizing breasts to the point where they are no longer seen for their natural intended purpose.
How do you feel about it?