I finally got the mani/pedi I have been harping about. I have to admit, it felt awesome. I have not had one of these in about nine months. Even as I write this I can’t help but glance at my nails every few words, taking in the pretty pink polish.

I knew it had been a long time when I realized how much prices have changed since I was last seen in a beauty/nail salon. Last time I got my nails done they were having a promo for a mani/pedi for $15. So I figured without a promo and with rising prices it would be around $25 now. Was it $25? No. I have to mention I didn’t go to a fancy place or anything. I live in Simi Valley not Beverly Hills. I went to the local neighborhood shop. This is the kind of of place where you can go next door to the local donut shop and still get a fresh baked donut for $0.25. So was my mani/pedi $30? No. But you are getting closer. $35 you may ask, maybe even incredulously? No. It was $40.

It was a little late to back out once the services had already been rendered, and I guess I should have asked the price before we began. But seriously? I am going to pretend I am wearing a rare shade of pink that no other salon in the continental United States carries. I should have gone with the zebra stripes in purple. Then I might be able to convince people of the rarity of my nails.

Yes. I said purple zebra stripes. When I was told to pick a color I went straight for the pinks. The weather is getting warmer, the colorful outfits are going to start coming out, so I wanted something springy/summery to kick off the season. The lady came by to offer a look at the newest colors they had received. One look and I went straight back to the pinks. Purple or gold zebra patterns.

Her: Brand new. Just arrived.

Me: Um, thank you, but they a little too much.

Her: Same price!

Me: Oh, yes, of course. I just don’t think I can do zebra.

Her: I do cheetah for you!

The expression on my face said everything. I can’t quite describe it, but it was somewhere between ghastly horror, amusement, and shock.

I remember back in the day the ladies at the nail places would try their darnedest to get me to put flowers on my toes. I generally declined. Sometimes they got very pushy, so occasionally I would give in. The flowers weren’t bad. In fact I kind of liked them once in a while. I just didn’t want to spend an extra $5. But wild animal print is altogether something else. And they were giving it away for free!

I was tempted to ask her if she can do elephant. Because I would want to know what that looks like. I would do elephant for free.